IT work is serious business, but we all need an occasional break…
That’s why we have started this IT Jokes Blog. Stop by occasionally to see a new IT- related or “geeky” joke and have a quick laugh on us. Note that we claim no authorship, ownership, nor copyrights on these jokes; rather, we are just informally passing them along to you as we normally would do “at the watercooler”. By the way, if you have a great IT-related or geeky joke that you would like to see posted, please send it to sales@netcablesplus.com.
But first, have a quick laugh with this brief video that offers an unique answer to those puzzling network glitches that always seem to crop up in the data center:
JOKE ARCHIVE: 2024 | 2023 | 2022 | 2021 | 2020 | 2019 | 2018 | 2017 | 2016 | 2015 | 2014 | 2013
January 20, 2025
Network Manager: If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
January 19, 2025
In a small town in the Midwest, there was a big Data Center that hired only married men as network engineers.
Concerned about this, a local woman called the network manager and asked him: “Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you think women are weak, dumb, cantankerous … or what?”
“Not at all, ma’am,” the network manager replied. “It is because our network engineers are used to obeying orders, are accustomed to being shoved around, know how to keep their mouths shut, and don’t pout when I yell at them.”
January 18, 2025
What do you call a Star Wars droid that takes the long way around?
R2 detour.
January 14, 2025
A Network Engineer approached his Network Manager and asked for a raise.
“Well” began the head man, “business is bad now, Jack, and I just can’t afford to give you a raise.”
“But I’m doing the work of three network engineer’s and I always have…” retorted Jack.
“Three network engineers’ work?” exploded the Network Manager. “Tell me who the other two are, and I’ll fire them!”
January 12, 2025
I asked the IT guy, “How do you make a motherboard?” and he said, “I tell her about my job.”
January 11, 2025
Dear Data Center Employee:
Re: Vacation Pay
Our records indicate that you have not used any vacation time over the past 100 year(s). As I’m sure you are aware, employees are granted 3 weeks of paid leave per year or pay in lieu of time off. One additional week is granted for every 5 years of service.
Please either take 9,400 days off work or, if you wish monetary compensation, notify our office and your next pay check will reflect payment of $8,277,432.22 which will include all pay and interest for the past 1,200 months.
Sincerely,
Automated Payroll Processing
January 9, 2025
What was a more useful invention than the first telephone?
The second telephone.
January 8, 2025
You Know You Are a Geek When
You look at a movie trailer and think, “I have that font.”
You get bittersweet nostalgic feelings about your long-lost Commodore 64 (or Sinclair ZX-81, TRS-80, etc.) and use large amounts of money and time trying to track one down.
You have more e-mail addresses than pairs of shoes.
Although vaguely insulted by pocket-protector jokes, you still find them funny.
Someone asks you what languages you know, and you reply: “Python, C, C++, React, Assembler, Javascript.”
January 6, 2025
A network software QA engineer walks into the bar, orders a beer, ten beers, 2.5 million beers, a dog, and leaves without paying.
January 1, 2025
NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO KEEP IF YOU’RE A NERD
I resolve… I resolve to… I resolve to, uh… I resolve to, uh, get my, er… I resolve to, uh, get my, er, off-line work done, too!
I will stop checking my e-mail at 3:00 in the morning… 4:30 is much more practical.
When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, “LOL… LOL!”
I will stop sending e-mail, Chat, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person.
I will try to figure out why I *really* need 9 e-mail addresses.
I will stop sending e-mail to my roommate.
I resolve to work with neglected children… my own.
I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm I answer e-mail.
When I subscribe to a newsgroup or mailing list, I will read all the mail I get from it.
I will stop using, “So, what’s your URL?” as a pickup line.
No more downloads from alt.binaries.*
I resolve to back up my new 4 TB hard drive daily… well, once a week… monthly, perhaps…
I will spend less than five hours a day on the Internet.
I will limit my top ten lists to ten items.
I will read the manual… just as soon as I can find it.